留学书信范例－12

By: Undergraduate Applicant50   

Subject:   Succesful Harvard Transfer

Briefly^{1, please indicate the most influential2 factors in your original decision to attend your present college, such as location, cost, large/small student body, only option, special program offered, Early Decision plan.}

Please indicate your intended field of specialization and briefly outline your academic plans at Harvard-Radcliffe.

What are your current postgraduate/career plans?

Briefly discuss one book that has strongly influenced you.

Please use the space below to discuss briefly the one or two extracurricular activities that have meant the most to you during college or high school. Which activities, if any, would you like to pursue while at Harvard-Radcliffe?

In the space below or on a separate sheet, please explain in some detail your reasons for wanting to transfer to Harvard-Radcliffe College.

I applied^{3 to the University of Pennsylvania under the Early Decision plan. U. Penn. has a beautiful campus, a diverse student body, and almost unlimited4 opportunities to excel at extra-curricular activities. My main motivation in applying under the Early Decision plan, however, was my eagerness to study at an Ivy5 League institution with one of the best liberal arts curricula available.}

I intend to eventually become an economist^{6. To achieve this goal, I would like to double major in economics and psychology7 at Harvard. Although this combination might seem unusual, I think it will enable me to practice economics with insight on human thinking. In addition to pursuing academic excellence8, I also intend to participate in research and extracurricular activities related to these two fields.}

After I graduate college, I intend to work for a few years in an economics-related field either in the United States or in Brazil, and then to go to graduate school. My long-term dream is to return to Brazil and help the government create a stable economic plan. The plan I envision would put Brazil, a country with great potential, on the right track to achieve a faster pace of development and to become, once again, a reliable country for international investment. With a stable economy, Brazil can invest more funds in critical areas like education. I will be very satisfied with my career if I know I have contributed to the development of a great economic power.

"YES.." was the final answer, and it made me feel like a master of negotiation^{9, excelling at a task at which both the treasurer10 and the president had failed. As a new board member of the Penn Brazilian Club, I had the responsibility of negotiating with Brazil, the restaurant which presently holds the monopoly of Brazilian food in Philadelphia. I was trying to get the restaurant to decrease the price of the "feijoada." This was the first chance I had to put in practice the techniques of "principled negotiation, " which I learned from the book Getting to Yes.}

Getting to Yes changed my life in almost every sense. On many occasions, my friends and relatives have expressed their admiration^{11 at the changes they noticed in my personality and behavior. Although I considered myself a good negotiator since childhood, Getting to Yes taught me how mistaken I was about the art of persuasion12. I have learned to search for alternatives which fulfill13 the interests of all parties to a negotiation, rather than to seek opportunities to take advantage of the opposition14. A masterpiece on the art of negotiation, Getting to Yes shows how reason, as opposed to force; interests, as opposed to positions; and the building of lasting15 relationships, as opposed to determination for "winning, " can bring victory to both sides in a negotiation.}

When I came to the United States from Brazil, I realized that American culture differed significantly from my own. I wanted to give the Americans I met an opportunity to learn from my culture as much as I was learning from theirs. To accomplish this goal, I founded the Pine Crest^{16 Brazilian Club, of which I became president and activities manager. The club soon grew into one of the most successful and active organizations at my Florida high school. The fifty members had the opportunity to experience the food, music, dance, and other cultural activities of Brazil. Although I am no longer in Florida, I have remained one of the most active board members of the Brazilian Club. In order to maintain the tradition I initiated17, I give advice to the company s president.}

In addition to being active in the Brazilian Club, I have also founded and played guitar in two bands. With one of my friends, I founded a band named Draconia which became very well-known throughout the entire school after our first concert in May of my junior year. As we began to practice more seriously, several more concerts followed. By my fourth week of college, I had already founded another band. My new band, KB-2,already has nine soft rock songs. Although we haven^{18 t yet had our first concert, our practices are intense and the members take their work very seriously.}

At Harvard, I expect to continue pursuing these two activities that have played such a large role in the formation of my personal traits. I owe to these activities most of my leadership and interpersonal skills. I am prepared for the challenge of creating the most active and successful Brazilian club Harvard has ever had, and, if possible, starting a new rock band there as well. In addition, I expect to get involved in undergraduate research projects and to engage in other activities related to my areas of specialization.

In order to succeed in a global, competitive, and fast-changing environment, an individual must have a broad background, yet also know a specific field very well. I want to transfer to Harvard-Radcliffe because no other school could possibly offer me such a solid liberal arts foundation, and at the same time, provide me with the knowledge, analytical^{19 skills, and confidence I will need to deal with the complexities20 of todays world. Only a rigorous academic institution like Harvard-Radcliffe will give me the education I desire in order to pursue my ever-rising personal and professional goals.}

Throughout my life, my goals have always shifted upward as soon as I get close to achieving them. During my sophomore^{21 year of high school, I realized that an education in Brazil would bring me neither intellectual nor personal fulfillment. Therefore, I decided22 to transfer to school in the United States. Despite having to struggle with a whole new language and way of life, I never lowered my high academic standards. I was proud to be accepted to Pine Crest, one of the top preparatory schools in the United States. At PC, new classes, teachers, extra-curricular activities and friends brought a great deal of excitement to my life. My success in high school added another rung to my ladder of goals: the prospect23 of getting an education in an American university. Although I had a 3.95 GPA, my SAT scores, affected24 by my language limitations, were not high enough to encourage me to apply to Harvard at that time. Instead, I applied to U. Penn.}

After six months, having accomplished^{25 all the goals I had for my first semester at Penn, I am now attempting to move up yet another rung in my ladder of achievements. I know Harvard is the world s finest and most rigorous educational institution. Since academic achievement is an unconditional26 priority to me, I will not settle for anything less than being one of the top students at the very best academic institution. I am willing to accept any challenges Harvard has to offer. Harvard s extremely well-balanced curriculum provides its graduates with a solid foundation for any future endeavor, whether it be in the academic or the professional world. I believe Harvard will be a springboard to help me reach all my future goals.}

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By: Undergraduate Applicant49   

Subject:   Succesful Yale Applicant2

We hope that your application essay will help the Admissions Committee better understand you and the ways in which Yale College might enable you to achieve your academic and personal goals. You should discuss your reasons for wishing to transfer to Yale. You may also wish to comment on your academic interests, extracurricular activities, and significant responsibilities outside of school.

While many students decide to apply to Yale for its prestige, the motivating factor for me was an innocent summer activity. I learned about Yale last summer when I served on the Executive Committee and taught for a program in New Haven, called Summerbridge New Haven. This program, based out of the Hopkins School, allows high school and college students to mentor^{28 and teach inner-city students who cannot afford a tuition-based program. Two of my co-workers were Yale students, and they informed me that Yale made major contributions to the program. Moreover, Yale generously offered the use of its facilities, including field trips to the Yale Daily News and other Yale sights that provided invaluable29 experiences for the students, some of whom had never toured Yale despite living in New Haven their entire lives. Several graduate students helped us gather textbooks and other information for the program s science classes, one of which I taught during the summer. I was very impressed with Yale s devotion to the betterment of the New Haven community. It attracts me because community service has always been a major part of my life. Before that summer, I have served programs such as Big Brothers/Big Sisters of Meriden-Wallingford and a tutoring program for West Philadelphia grammar school students.}

Beyond Yale s intense involvement in the community, another reason I would like to transfer to Yale is because of its acclaimed^{30 international relations and economic departments. My interest in economics arose early, as I was the president of the business club at my high school, Choate Rosemary Hall. I also participated in the Fed Challenge, in which Choate selected a team of five economics students to represent the school in a national economics contest in Washington, DC. We attempted to prove, through intense research, what monetary31 policy the Fed should implement32 in its next Board of Governors meeting. Our performance in the competition won each of us a $4,000 scholarship and a year-long subscription33 to Business Week . This contest was exciting and sparked my current passion for economics. Hence, Yale s exceptional economics department would be a wonderful resource for me. In addition to economics, I also enjoy studying languages and the interaction between foreign countries. At Penn, I have attained34 proficiency35 in German and am now taking my second semester of Polish. Both Yale s foreign language and international relations departments are very strong and would greatly enhance my education.}

Another factor in my decision to apply to Yale as a transfer student has been my father s illness. My father was recently diagnosed with lung cancer and has begun feeling quite ill. As New Haven is near my home in Wallingford, attending Yale would allow me to spend more time with my father and let me aid him with some of the tasks that he can no longer do because of his illness. Though his illness has played some role in my decision, my academic interests in Yale are still the main reasons for my desire to transfer.

I have a variety of college interests that I hope to continue at Yale. These include working as an associate for the Daily Pennsylvanian, Penn s student newspaper, and co-founding the Options and Hedging Strategy Club, an investment club that works in conjunction with Philadelphia investment banking^{36 houses and offers Penn students information sessions on investment strategies. I would love the opportunity to work for such a reputable student newspaper as the Yale Daily News and start a similar investment strategy club at Yale. Through my previous experiences with Yale, and based on my current interests, I am certain that Yale and I would be a perfect fit.}